Turning 50: 50 Shades of Awesome
August 7, 2012 by almostakiss
Today I turn 50. It doesn’t seem possible. Half a century sounds so old. I don’t feel old or look THAT old. If I didn’t look in the mirror, I’d think somebody was punking me. At times I still feel 19, other times 25, other times 33, 44, etc. If our bodies didn’t betray our age by wearing out and our skin didn’t sag, age would truly be a number. Instead our life experiences show on us either on the outside or more likely on the inside. We carry everything good and bad that’s happened to us. From the most life altering and tragic things to the most insignificant, they make us who we are. I often wonder if certain good things didn’t happen to us, would we turn bitter? If certain bad things didn’t happen, would we know enough to appreciate the good? If there wasn’t a stigma attached to getting older, I would have to say I like part of it. I like knowing that each year I learn more about myself and the world around me.
It’s funny how when we’re young, we want to be older so badly so we’ll be taken seriously. Often teenagers lie about their ages so they can drink but they also want what they say to count. In our 30’s we start no longer telling our ages like it’s nothing. Unless someone asks, we just don’t mention it. In the next decade, we say we’re somewhere in our 40’s and leave it at that. Even if we are only a week away from 50. Seeing my mom still living and enjoying life at 91 makes me realize that I can surely enjoy being OLD. It beats the alternative.
Once I got onto Twitter and then into blogging, I felt like I was born 10+ years too late. I wasn’t taught computers in school and even if I had been, I don’t know if I could’ve caught on. I had a bit of it in my Senior Physics class where we had to write a 1 sentence or 1 paragraph computer program. It would have been easier for me to learn Italian by osmosis. It was so far over my head that I had my best buddy Roger write it for me. I never cheated or copied anyone’s work before but this just would not register in my brain. He wasn’t keen on doing it but was a champ about it. I’m afraid my online pals in their 30’s won’t want to associate with a 50 year old. I know all my life, I’ve had friends of different ages, some 11 years older, some 15 years or more younger. Age doesn’t really factor into it for me yet I worry it will make a difference to others. I had an Instagram friend who I thought I was getting close to and when she found out I was old enough to be her mother, she couldn’t distance herself far enough.
What have I learned by age 50? Too much to put in one post. The highlights? That all cliches have some truth in them. There’s no place like home. Home is where the heart is. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Out of sight, out of mind.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Marriage is a rollercoaster that you have to be belted in securely for and not jump out when it bottoms out. I love this analogy and need to write a blog post about this. 😉
You can’t make anyone else do anything. From quitting smoking to biting their nails to losing weight. You can’t make them love you or be nice to you. You can only control yourself. There are so many things like this that you can be told over and over but they don’t sink in. Until they “click” in your brain, you will keep trying, failing and being miserable.
You don’t make fun of someone because it can come back to bite you in the butt. Just because you don’t understand how someone can “let themselves go” and weigh over 200 lbs. doesn’t mean you won’t one day be there yourself. Then you’ll be “at least I’m not 350 lbs.”. You don’t want to go there. So don’t think ill of others. You don’t always know what’s going on behind the scenes or what someone dealt with growing up or what demons they are battling. Cut people some slack and maybe they’ll do the same.
You need to do things in life that you don’t want to. Like study, go to school, be nice to people you don’t like (to a point), go to the doctor, wrap presents, etc. It does build character plus it’s usually the right thing to do.
Don’t let people take advantage of you. It doesn’t make you mean to call someone out if they are using you. It makes you smart. What good is it to have a bunch of people calling you for favors or making you do their dirty work if they don’t even remember down the line the sacrifices you made? Be true to yourself. Do what you can live with. If you can’t live with someone being mad at you, you will always feel like you are spending your life pleasing others. By age 50 you need to start pleasing yourself and I don’t mean only sexually. 😉
If you’d like to wish me a Happy Birthday, this is the place to do it. Or if you want to give me something that won’t cost you anything, you can retweet one of my blog posts (your fave), tell someone about my blog or put me on your blogroll. JeezLouise.net was the first to do it awhile ago and it made me happier than a pig wallowing in mud. 🙂
If you think it’s awfully forward of me to make the above suggestions, it probably is. In the last half of my 50 years, I’ve learned you get NOTHING if you don’t ask for it. Share your birthday with me in the comments, if I don’t already know, so I can return the favor!